Hello & Welcome Back!
If you’ve read the Tarot for any amount of time, you’ve inevitably asked yourself the following questions at least a thousand times:
“What do I do when people ask me about my job or what I do for work?”
“Should I mention that I have a business? “But what if they ask about the type of business?”
“Should I tell people I read the Tarot or not?”
This is one of the most complex and uncomfortable aspects of working with the Tarot because you never really know how people will take it or what they’re going do with the information.
In today’s post we’re going to talk about how-to open up to your friends and family about your love of there Tarot and what to do when someone asks about your job or work-life.
I’ll also share the FIVE steps that I’ve personally taken that have helped me maneuver my way through the sometimes tricky waters of being a professional Tarot reader with style and grace!
Let me preface all of this by saying there’s no real right or wrong way to come out of the Tarot Closet and it’s entirely up to you if and when you decide to share your Tarot business with anyone.
The following are only suggested steps designed to help make the “coming out process” a lot less fearful and a whole lot more encouraging!
I thoroughly believe that there’s a time to speak and a time to remain silent. I always advise my students that it’s better to proceed with caution and let your intuition be your guide.
However, if you’re interested in learning how to open the door to conversation then I have a few pointers to help get you going in the right direction!
You’re Here Because…
My imagination tells me a part of you wakes up every single morning feeling happy, excited, and genuinely grateful that you have the Tarot in your life.
You’ve done the work and have gone through many stages of self-improvement and spiritual development with the help of your cards and you’re finally beginning to live the life you’ve always wanted.
You’ve had the privilege of helping your clients experience deep transformation in many different areas of their lives due to your beautiful readings and soulful coaching.
Girl, you are on fire!
And you can’t wait to share that love and excitement with your friends and family because you know just how powerful a Tarot reading can be.
And when you meet new people you want to shout it from the roof-tops that you have the most amazing and BADASS job in the world! You want to share your gift, your website, and all your amazing offerings with everyone around you.
And yet, I bet there’s also a whole other side of you.
I bet there’s a side that isn’t sure what to do. You want to tell your friends and family about the Tarot but you’re secretly worried about what they might think.
What if they don’t like it, what if they think it’s evil, or something else?
And when people do ask you about your work or your business, you suddenly find yourself short on words, struggling to find an answer, or making up a big-fat lie.
And it’s not because you’re a liar or that you’re ashamed of the Tarot, it’s because deep-down you know and I know how weird some folks are about it.
You might be afraid that being a professional Tarot reader could negatively influence your day-job, your partner’s job, your children’s livelihood, and more.
Or maybe the people in your life that do know about your Tarot business may worry about how it could negatively impact their lives.
ALL of THAT might lead to you not feeling very confident about building your business and sharing the Tarot with anyone!
Right now, you might be seriously second-guessing your choice to become or continue to be a professional Tarot reader!
I totally hear you.
You’ll hear me say a lot that I’ve stood right where you are a THOUSAND times and I’ve felt every single thought and every single emotion you’re feeling right now as well.
I’ve also had the same exact questions and concerns. It’s not far-fetched to feel the way that we do about the Tarot. It sucks that it’s such a double-edged sword.
In my opinion, the Tarot is one of if not the best tool for personal and spiritual development that I’ve ever had the honor of using.
It can do so many things at one time. I’m so blessed to have been introduced to it and I use it every single day.
The Tarot has extraordinary potential to help us break-free from some of our biggest blocks and obstacles that have held us back from achieving everything we’ve always wanted.
It can help us to discover our greatest gifts, our deepest passion, and our soul-purpose.
We can learn how to attract and grow true-love relationships. We can learn to identify and break-free from deeply-rooted and generational money issues
It can help us get to the root of our negative thinking, self-sabotaging behavior, addictions, trauma, pain, etc.
The Tarot can help us connect to our passion and purpose and guide us to create highly successful businesses, and so much more!
But all some people can see are those insane myths and stories that were never true to begin with.
And it causes big-hearted, intelligent, and sophisticated women like us to doubt and second-guess whether or not we should share our Tarot business or not.
I mean how ludicrous is that? Just typing these words on this paper and saying them out loud in my head pisses me the fuck off.
We shouldn’t be afraid to share our career.
In all honesty, In 2020, we shouldn’t be afraid or even remotely concerned to publicly share our career. Ultimately, it’s nobody’s business what we do for a living or how we make our money.
With the way that the world is opening up and changing in so many other areas of life, it’s only natural to surmise that it would be safe to come out of the Tarot Closet as well.
We have to feel confident about what we do. We want our clients to feel confident as well. We want them to feel happy and excited to get a reading with us. We don’t want anyone to feel worried or embarrassed that they go to a Tarot reader, FFS.
But let’s get real for a moment
As we talked about in my previous post, some people can seriously lose their mind when they hear that we read the Tarot. They accuse us of witchcraft, hearesey, devil-worship, and other crazy occult non-sense.
In fact, I’ve discovered that some people would be more comfortable if I said I committed a crime and did time in JAIL as opposed to telling them that I read the Tarot.
I’ve tested that theory multiple times, btw. It was a lot of fun! In all seriousness though, in the very beginning of my career, I didn’t let much deter me.
I’m a true rebel and warrior-spirit at heart so when I first came out about the Tarot my attitude was FUCK THAT, I’m not holding back for anyone If they didn’t like what I’m doing, then they could fuck off.
I was raised in a pretty diverse home and if you know me at all, you know my family didn’t blink ONE eye when I told them I was going to become a professional Tarot reader. I think they half-expected it.
I was super hell-bent to do what I was going to do and be who I was going to be, no matter what.
Along with the full-throttle ego, I thoroughly believed my friends were going to be cool with it as well. I sincerely thought everyone would love my new career and they’d be happy about my new venture.
But I was wrong. BIG wrong. B-I-G W-R-O-N-G.
The truth of the matter was once I made the BIG announcement that I was transferring out of my relationship coaching business to pursue the Tarot full-time you could hear a pin drop.
My family congratulated me but then things began to get weird. I did lose a few friends, one very good friend in particular and it was a huge blow.
To be even more honest, I have less friends that openly communicate with me especially since I began teaching the Tarot. I’ll talk more about that below but yeah, it was totally awkward.
Of course my followers and people I was already reading for were thrilled, but certainly not everyone else was .
In my time with the Tarot I’ve seen and heard a lot of things. Intentional ignorance runs deep and you never really know what people are thinking, especially the ones you do know.
And it doesn’t just stop with us..
Our career CAN and DOES affect our loved ones.
A few years back, my husband worked at a company and was very worried about them discovering I was a Tarot reader. Although he’s very proud of who I am and what I do, he didn’t know how his work would’ve been about it.
As I’m writing this it’s beginning to sound dumber and dumber that someone would “worry” that I was a Tarot reader, AS IF I were a mass-murderer, drug lord, or some other heinous creature.
At about five years into that job, they hired someone who looked me up online and supposedly found videos of me doing readings on Periscope because he came to work one day talking about the “Tarot” what it might be like to be married to a “Tarot reader”.
Suddenly the word “Tarot” was a very popular buzzword around my husband’s workplace for several years and he kept that up until my husband moved on to a better job.
But let me tell you, it was very uncomfortable for a while. We didn’t know what to do, it was stressful to say the least.
Moving on…I have two daughters that are very bright and ambitious and both have very good careers.
Although they don’t worry about my Tarot business so much, a part of them still feels a little funny when they meet new people and they ask about their parents.
In fact, one of my daughters has a prominent person in her life who is very much against what I do.
But it is what it is. I’m not changing who I am and she stands up for me.
I mean, we laugh about it and both of my girls are cool about my work, but I imagine life would be easier if I were a nurse, or an artist, or something far less dramatic than being a Tarot-reader!
There’s more to life than me…
Over the years I began to realize that maybe more was at stake than just my rebel-heart and warrior-spirit.
I began to think about the effect my career might have on my loved ones and the things that people may say to them or do to them because of me.
Now more than ever, people can feel extremely indignant when they don’t like something and they can cause serious problems for you when you don’t conform.
Especially with the internet. They can look up where you live, where you work, or where your spouse works. They can look up your family and your children.
They can look up your personal information anytime they want for just a few dollars. We just never know what someone’s intentions are.
And again, I don’t say any of these things to scare you, I just want you to be aware of some of the possibilities.
So where does this leave us?
On one hand, we have to TELL PEOPLE WHAT WE DO because that’s how we get new clients. We have to advertise and actively promote ourselves.
On the other hand, you have some unstable folks that can cause great damage for you an your loved ones.
There’s two schools of thought:
One: We can succumb to the pressure of the ignorance around us and sacrifice our success by keeping our career a secret and quit the Tarot forever.
Two: Or, we give society a giant F and a U, tell them to stick it where the sun doesn’t shine, and do whatever the hell we want! I like this one the best!)
Both points do have merit but in the end I had to learn how to compromise with my objectives and become selective of who I share the Tarot with.
I learned to walk that fine-line between badass and dumbass.
My years of being a professional Tarot reader has caused me to be a little less forthcoming with my career when I meet new people.
I’ve learned not to say too much at first. I don’t lie or stumble over my words but also don’t try to shove it down someone’s throat.
I kind of kick-back and try to get a vibe too see how they feel.
If I feel comfortable, I may mention it, but if not I have a safe and effective response that leaves everyone feeling good and opens the doors to do business later if they’re open to the experience.
I learned to use my rebel-heart and warrior-spirit to help fuel my love of the Tarot where it matters the most with people who matter the most.
I learned that not everyone is ready or worthy of working with the Tarot and instead of trying to shove it down someone’s throat, trying to convince them of how amazing it is, I just chose to let the haters step to the left.
To help you transition effortlessly and easily into this process, I’m sharing with you my FIVE steps that’ll allow you to drop the fear and gain the confidence you need to step out of the Tarot-Closet.
You’ll learn how to let your Tarot-Light shine when you feel safe and tuck in those edges when you feel threatened.
Five Tips for Coming out of the Tarot Closet With Style & Grace
TIP NUMBER ONE:
Before Making Any Announcements, Get Your Education On First
How we present the Tarot will determine how others receive the Tarot.
So before we go and make any big announcements we want to be sure we know what we’re talking about because you’ll be far more likely to have people take you seriously when you take it seriously.
Make sure you take a little time and explore the Tarot for yourself. Read, study, practice, and have a really good indication for why you love the Tarot and why it’s so important to you.
You’ll Want to Have a Good Idea About the Following:
+ What does being a professional Tarot reader mean to you and why do you want to pursue this career?
+ What exactly do you plan to do with the cards and how do you want to help people?
+ What kind of difference do you want to make in the world?
+ Who are the people you want to serve?
+ What types of issues do they have and what types of services will you be offering?
+ The truth behind the myths and how to properly respond when people say dumb things about the Tarot.
The reason being is when people hear your personal testimony and how important the Tarot is to you, they’re far more likely to take you seriously and treat you with respect.
Plus, you’ll also be able to talk intelligently and answer questions logically.
It’s when we start to sound confused and unsure of what we’re doing or when we dance around the subject is when people begin to question our intentions and think it’s just a passing phase.
You want your family and friends to see that you know what you’re talking about and that you’re committed to the process. You don’t have to be an expert and be able to recite with perfection everything there is to know about the Tarot.
But you do want to take a moment to ground, center, and focus on your education and get clear on what the Tarot means to you and the type of difference you plan to make in the world.
Then you can begin to elaborate and think about your next steps afterwards…
If possible, I recommend telling the people closest to you, whomever that is for you, before you announce your venture to the world, especially on social media.
This may include your immediate family, significant other, parents, siblings, children, the BFF, or anyone else you consider “close”.
The reason being is this can turn out like the “telephone game” and depending on who finds out first, chances are it won’t translate clearly down the line of people in the way it needs to be.
That’s exactly how gossip begins and how some of the biggest issues take root. Your loved ones can end up feeling deceived because you didn’t tell them yourself and that may lead to them feeling that the Tarot is deceitful as well.
They may already have a negative opinion about the cards to begin with so you don’t want to do anything that may fuel the fire.
I personally believe that being transparent and talking in an open and honest fashion sets the foundation for the way they perceive you and the Tarot going forward.
Now, your family may not like it, they may not agree with you and your choice to become a professional Tarot reader, but at least they can’t accuse you of being dishonest about it.
And who knows, it may actually open the door for future conversations later.
Let’s remember this as well, no matter who’s in our life, how important they are, who we tell first or last, we’re still adults. You and me, we’re grown.
We’re too old to be sneaking around and doing things behind people’s backs. We can do whatever we want, when we want.
You’re NOT asking your loved ones for permission. You’re not asking for anyone’s approval or blessing either. You’re just eliminating speculation and side-chatter by being clear about your intentions and aspirations.
Our conversations are merely a courtesy to inform those closest to us this is who we are and what we’re doing. If anyone has that big of a problem, it’s up to them to work it out.
This isn’t about you…YOU just keep going forward!
TIP NUMBER THREE:
Create a Back-Up Plan
There are going to be situations where you are not necessarily going to want to tell everyone you’re a professional Tarot reader and for each of us, it’s going to be different.
Perhaps you’re meeting your fiance’s family for the first time, beginning a new job, at a doctors office visit, or at an even at your children’s school and it might feel a little awkward announcing you’re a professional Tarot reader, right off the cuff.
If you’re in a situation where you’re unsure about how people may react, I highly suggest having what I call a “Tarot business back-up description” rehearsed and ready to go.
This is an alternative description, that relays WHAT you do in your business and/or HOW you help your clients in a way that’s truthful and inline with the Tarot.
You really don’t want to flat-out lie to people because for one, you’re not a liar, and two you don’t want to have that negative energy poisoning you or your career.
Plus some of these people may actually be into the Tarot but it’s too soon to tell. So you want to be sure to keep your response realistic so if in the future you feel more comfortable, you can easily open the door to that conversation.
Depending on your particular practice, you may refer to yourself as a Life-Coach, a Spiritual-Coach, maybe a Spiritual Educator, or a Mind, Body, Spirit Practitioner, etc.
Maybe you’re a licensed physician, psychologist, or other registered health-care provider and readings are a part of your service.
This is why doing the first part of this exercise and doing your due-diligence is so important. You need to know how the cards work and the different ways people use the Tarot in their business or incorporate it into their current business.
Write down exactly what you do with the Tarot, rework it onto an alternative description, make yourself a 30 second commercial, and practice saying it over and over until you feel comfortable.
That way, when people inquire about the type of work you do, you have a credible and consistent response. If they ask any additional questions or about booking one of your services you can simply say you’re not accepting new clients. That’s it!
But keep it simple, don’t get into the minuta, and just be wiling go with it!
TIP NUMBER FOUR:
Be Prepared to Lose Friends
Now I touched on this one a little bit earlier but unfortunately not everyone is going to be understanding or accepting that you read the Tarot.
When I decided to shift from relationship coaching and read the Tarot full-time I did lose a very close TEN-YEAR friendship. I couldn’t believe it.
I heard this individual speak to me and say things to me she’s never said before and I was so upset about it.
In fact, I still am because I truly liked this person and I valued her intellect and insight. She’s a smart and dynamic business woman and I really enjoyed our friendship.
Also, some of my longtime friends, people I’ve known from elementary through high school, begin to communicate with me less and less. I have a personal account on Facebook and we all used to interact and engage and after that, a lot of them stopped talking to me and some even “unfriended me”!
It kinda pissed me off but I have to laugh because it’s just so immature and childish. Really? You’re going to unfriend me when I know so much about you?
I’ve also noticed on other social media formats like Periscope, where I’ve done over 800 “scopes”, there are communities where people I feel are either afraid to talk to me or are afraid of what their friends will say.
I’ve learned we obviously can’t change people or force a person to see our way. we can only go forward being the very best example of what a professional Tarot reader is and does and hope that one day they get it.
I’ve come to realize these people are not my friends. It doesn’t matter how long or how well you know someone, if they’re going to turn on you over a career choice, then they’re not a true friend.
I believe these people have a whole set of additional problems far and away from us being Tarot Readers. And that’s the truth.
If they don’t have the sense or the decency to at least talk to you about it or express their feelings or concerns, then they’re not your true friends!
People who can have problems with us for all kinds of reasons, not just the Tarot. It could be about the choice of diapers you put on your kids butt, whether you breast-feed or bottle-fed, or the person you voted for the presidency.
I know it hurts, but you know what the bright light in all of this is?
People who randomly leave our life make a way for the people who do get us! That’s right. I may have lost a few “acquaintances” but I gained a TON of new friends and supporters who love me for exactly who I am and what I do.
You’ll now have a clear path to attract real friends and supporters who truly want to be around you and your amazing energy.
Because when we’re doing the right thing, when we answer our “call”, Spirit has a way of making everything work out to our benefit.
Those people who we thought were our friends, who think they’re better than us or that they have something over us have nothing but a mess of foolishness and blatant ignorance,
That’s an energetic combination we don’t want in our midst.
So keep your head up, keep your dream alive, and don’t let their negative attitude get to you. By staying true to yourself, everything will work out exactly as it should.
TIP NUMBER FIVE:
You Don't Owe Anyone an Explanation
or An Apology
The biggest lesson I’ve learned so far is that even though people may have a problem you or the Tarot, it’s their problem, not yours.
Please don’t take on someone else’s misguided misconceptions as your truth and please don’t apologize for doing the work of your soul.
I’ve had people contact me and say, “I can’t believe you read the Tarot, do you know what the Tarot is? You’re going to go straight to hell for using those cards!”
I simply reply, “I’m a professional Tarot reader and if you’re interested in learning more about what that means and how I help people, I’d be happy to share that with you”.
I may also include something like, “It’s unfortunate that you feel the way you do and if you happen to change your mind, I’m open to sharing how the Tarot can change your life too!”
I never say “I’m sorry” because I’m not sorry for who I am and what I do. But it is unfortunate that people can be so closed-minded.
I’m 100% unapologetic for being the person I was created to be. I don’t act small or insignificant around others who don’t get me.
I don’t try to convince others how great the Tarot is.
I don’t argue, explain myself, make up lies, make excuses, or downplay my love of the Tarot. I don’t say or do things to “lessen the blow” or to make others feel more comfortable around me or the Tarot.
I am who I am. I look and dress like a modern professional business woman. It took me a long-time to be comfortable in my own skin and excel at something on this level.
When we walk around acting like we’re doing something wrong, or we keep seeking approval from people who know nothing about us, and feel like we have to apologize for who we are, it subconsciously gives the impression that they have some kind of some dominion or authority over us.
That’s just not true.
There is no one above you or that you need approval from.
There’s no one you need to apologize to and nothing you have to apologize for. You haven’t done anything wrong.
You don’t owe anyone jack-shit.
The only person you owe anything to is your Higher Power for bringing you to the Tarot and yourself for picking it up and running with it. That’s it.
If people want to be a part of your life, they will be. Trust me. The more you respect yourself and your Tarot business the more people will respect you.
The haters can step all the way to the back of the room and two seats to the left.
So don’t worry, you’re beautiful! Keep being you, keep doing what you love.
And while not everyone will agree with your choice to become a professional Tarot reader, not everyone will understand your complete fascination with the cards, you may never be able to shout our joy from the roof-tops, and certainly not everyone will be your friend, but what’s possible is that you can enjoy ENJOY the amazing opportunity!
Dude, we’re professional Tarot readers and we have the most BADASS career ever! It just doesn’t get any better than this.
Invite you to take some time today and think about my five tips and go through each one to discover your own feelings and answers
I’m not a lawyer nor do I practice law and my blog is not considered “legal advice”.
The “tips” I share is considered “suggestions” and you are responsible to determine ideas to improve your experience with the Tarot.
If you have a real fear for your life or of any type of bodily harm, I urge you to take proper precautions and and legal action if you fear you may be harmed for your association with the Tarot.
I, Krysten Burkhardt-Hansyn, remain free from all charges and harm if you acquire any type of injury or loss from you taking the suggestions on this page.
I’m simply offering suggestions based on my own experiences. Ultimately, YOU are responsible for your own thoughts and actions. Please proceed with caution!
If at anytime you feel threatened because of your association with the Tarot or you unfortunately become the victim of an alleged hate-crime, I urge you to contact your local authorities to file a report or contact someone in your legal jurisdiction to seek legal advice.
Please take the time to learn the laws in your city, state, and country.
BRIGHTEST Blessings + Namaste’!